Unbecoming: embracing authentic liberation

Unbecoming is the intentional process of shedding societal expectations, past traumas, and self-imposed limitations in order to embrace and reveal one’s authentic self.

Unbecoming is important because it empowers individuals to break free from societal molds, release the weight of past traumas, and authentically connect with their true selves. By shedding the layers of expectations and self-imposed limitations, unbecoming allows for personal growth, self-acceptance, and the realization of untapped potential. It’s a transformative process that enables individuals to live life on their own terms, fostering inner peace, empowerment, and a genuine sense of fulfillment

From a young age, many of us are conditioned to believe that we must mold ourselves into certain shapes in order to be loved and accepted. The narrative of unbecoming challenges this notion, inviting individuals to let go of the version of themselves they’ve constructed solely to gain others’ approval. Unbecoming for love means recognizing that one’s inherent worth transcends the need for validation from external sources. Embracing authenticity becomes an act of self-love, where the layers of pretense are stripped away, revealing the beauty of the unadulterated self.

Unbecoming isn’t just the unraveling of external layers; it’s the confrontation of internal echoes. Psychiatrist Carl Jung illuminated, “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” Unbecoming generational trauma requires courage—digging deep to sever the chains that have bound families through generations. As Bruce Lipton, renowned cell biologist and author, beautifully reflects, “The moment you change your perception is the moment you rewrite the chemistry of your body.” Cultural assumptions and social pressures can restrict people to limited roles and norms. Therefore, challenging cultural assumptions means liberating oneself from the restrictions imposed by these predetermined ideas.

Taking charge by rejecting waiting is the most authoritative way to establish your control. Renowned artist Frida Kahlo once declared, “Why do I need feet when I have wings to fly?” Unbecoming is like spreading wings, soaring into your potential without needing approval. As poet Nayyirah Waheed wrote, “...and I whispered to my body, gently, I want to be your companion, and after a deep breath, it replied, I’ve been waiting my whole life for this.” Unbecoming in this context is the long-awaited connection between oneself and purpose—a lively assertion of independence and an offer to revel in the brilliance of one’s existence.

Here are a few noteworthy instances of individuals who have embarked on transformative unbecoming journeys:

• From a challenging upbringing marred by poverty and abuse, Oprah Winfrey discarded the constraints of her past. She evolved into a media tycoon, philanthropist, and advocate for self-empowerment and authenticity.
• Surviving a Taliban assassination attempt, Malala Yousafzai shed the shackles of fear and oppression. She championed girls’ education, earning a Nobel Prize and becoming an emblem of courage.
• J.K. Rowling transcended financial struggles and self-doubt prior to her global recognition. Through the creation of the “Harry Potter” series, she kindled inspiration, raising awareness about vital social issues.
• During his prison tenure, Nelson Mandela rejected anger and bitterness, emerging as a unifying force. He steered South Africa towards inclusivity and reconciliation.
• After being ousted from his company, Steve Jobs navigated past setbacks and embarked on fresh beginnings. Returning to Apple, he pioneered transformative technology, reshaping industries.
• Prince Harry and Meghan Markle distanced themselves from royal traditions and media scrutiny. Their unbecoming journey attests to their dedication to personal autonomy and individual paths.

These instances underscore how unbecoming can trigger profound personal growth, metamorphosis, and positive influence on individuals and society. In a world often cluttered with illusions, unbecoming emerges as a powerful act of self-liberation. It’s a transformative journey from being who we thought we had to be to embracing the raw, authentic self—the self that was buried beneath layers of expectations and conformity. Philosopher Alan Watts encapsulated it beautifully: “The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” Unbecoming is that dance—a harmonious choreography of shedding, growing, and becoming. Through this path, we don’t just find ourselves; we unleash the beauty of our true essence, unburdened and unencumbered.

© Mindfluentworld, 2023